Divorce, Single Parenting, Dating, Sex, & Self-Recovery


Happy Birthday, Can You Do Some Laundry?


Last night, in planning for the transition to my house, my ex-wife also asked if she could send the kids over with a couple loads of laundry for me to do. Um… What? Not only is it Thanksgiving, it’s my birthday and I have the kids for two days before they go back to her house.

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Of course it doesn’t matter that it’s my birthday, or Thanksgiving, really. It’s all about the kids, right?

One more chore I won’t be doing. Just another in a long series of disappointments, I’m sure. She can take the laundry to her boyfriend’s house or to a laundromat. I am neither.

And happy Thanksgiving back at ya.

Yes, I’m afforded a bitch and moan post every now and then. (grin)


The Off Parent

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she is late, or missing, or lost


[from a second wave – poetry]

it is not the kiss i miss
nor the hand in pocket
heart-shaped mind bending love
it’s all of it
that’s missing
the bed of great size
still made up on one side
the coffee for one
and reading aloud to myself alone

she’s taking her own sweet time getting here
perhaps my notes are not making it through
or maybe i’m not ready yet
for the explosions in the sky
to rip smack the smile off my face
and leave me breathlessly chasing
every second together
and aching with anticipation
any time we’re apart

i’ve known love
felt the deepest ocean of loss
at just saying good-bye
as we leave for work
i want you to be my
be my

something’s broken this time
as the poetic and the authentic
are vastly distant realities
and this hole in my heart
is also a joy
a love that i long to give again
more than words
and love letters
more than aspirational longing

a love poem without a receiver
is an arrow shot into the night sky
hoping to bring down a star
exclaiming to god and the whispering trees
how love is good
and how i am ready
and she is late
or missing
or lost

this night she is not reading love poems
she shines and sparkles with friends
while my missiles land around her
without voice or sound






and sharpening

each vowel

for impact

i let go yet another


image: new years 007, timber tank, creative commons usage

imaginary you

off-suenodeluz[from a second wave – poetry]

word word word and more words
ricochet around my mind
until sleep becomes an aspiration
of course it is you i reach for
with line and letter
of multiplying
and hopeful promise
of imaginary you


image: sueño de luz, jesus solana, creative commons usage

before the transformation


[from a second wave – poetry]

and in the rush the throng the bustle
i love you more than ever
where ever you may be
in this blackest of all black fridays
so far from me at this moment
yet so close in flame and spirit
i am prepping myself for your arrival
with strengthening exercises and lip balm
making playlists for lovemaking
and perfecting breakfast routines
it’s no wonder, no mystery, why you’re hiding
the ache inside each of us
has not synchronized
the destabilization of our old lives
is still in progress
time before
and time after
your arrival


in the flames of future lovers

OFF-girlonfire[from a second wave – poetry]

i want a dangerous woman
attitude to spare
swagger to match mine


is that part of the problem
am i addicted to adrenal acceleration
are the dangerous curves i wish for
part of my crash and burn routine


something sedate
less driven
less ferarri


in the moments we do have left
i want to spark and burn
bonfires to old vanities
offerings to gods lesser known
pagan and sweaty





image: g-golden girl, kamillia, oliveira, creative common usage