Divorce, Single Parenting, Dating, Sex, & Self-Recovery

Posts tagged “breakup poem

dark woundings of my own

OFF-dark-mermaid

[from a second wave – poetry]

the precision in a glass of wine
loosening the tongue just enough
to truthfully expose the inner heart
the pumping seething heart
rich red with healthy passion
or black blue with choked off pain
i cannot stand in your way
nor cushion your deep slide this time
my target is moving now
released by your trigger finger
and slippery anger-joke-anger
mad, just kidding, is still mad
and opening the door
date-night door, as well
with “i’m mad” is a sure sign
as sure as the slight slur
almost imperceptible, almost passable
but the message uncoiled and venomous
was unfiltered this time, by feints and jests
and the bile poured on the floor between us
what could’ve caused the flood
releasing pent-up frustrations and …
what
a deathly release from being loved
a striking to keep from feeling
a fear greater than being loved
a fear of loving and losing again

i can’t survive this poison
i’ve seen too clearly the trajectory of loss
disappointment and un. met. expectations.
i survived this song long ago
so long, i no longer want to do the dance
around the venomous tongue
the wounded and striking viper
i won’t go back to charming
starring with glassy eyes, praying
playing the flute
hoping for a long and happy life
i failed my snake charming class
and burned the books
branded with my F
but released from that prison
of dangerous shadows and unknown traps
i am released and recovering
from dark woundings of my own
i won’t take on more
hurt
no matter
what the
love
provided

now

or

then

8-1-2014

image: models dive 25 meters, bejamin von wong, creative commons usage


i knew

breakup poetry - the off parent

 [from The Black Pages – poetry]

one night, I was confused
i had a moment when
i thought that you were leaving
imagined you were gone

and when I felt afraid
i told you how i loved you
you looked at me so strange
that’s when I knew,

i knew
that is was true
that you were already gone
that it was you
and you were already gone

so now I count my blessings
i wonder what it’s for
so many broken angels
and other closing doors

but i knew
that is was true
that you were already gone
that it was you
and you were already gone

any time you looked distant
were you thinking of the other side
and the moment you decided
to change both our lives…

there’s no repair between us
there’s nothing left to fight
i’ve fallen in the darkness
and you’ve left in the night

and i knew

4-28-14

image: goodbye for awhile, Merra Marie, creative commons usage