Divorce, Single Parenting, Dating, Sex, & Self-Recovery

dialing back desire

spent-tennis-shoes-250

[from strange horizons poems]

let’s say the universe works in mysterious ways
and imagining that
what if a woman showed up
casually
asked to play tennis
not an ordinary woman
not just anyone
a friend

and let’s also imagine
the universe in her mystery
is also capable of delivering you
right at the moment you are ready
whether you think so or not
and just as you’ve said
pause
opt-out
the woman stands up
with a beautiful smile
and some historical knowledge
that could serve as a catalyst
a familiarity
even when whole lifetimes have happened
between your last greeting

so even before the first ball is struck
or skirt worn
there’s a flight of fantasy
a scenario of seduction
and being seduced
because
there is no waiting
no lines
and no other moment
like this one

what if
she’s showed up
because
the universe has finally spun a complete cycle
and brought you back to the restart
try again
listen, look, observe

what if there’s nothing
just an acquaintance
and some new fuzzy yellow balls

that is more than enough
just
the idea
has
potency

i am hopeful
even when letting go
this is no different
this is just a turn of events
a series of events
that hasn’t happened yet

release
there’s no hurry
even if she is the one
if she is
and
she’s here
why
rush
why
hurry through
this
magic

1-7-15

image: spent tennis shoes of the author, cc 2014, creative commons usage

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