she said | The Off Parent The Off Parent

love song for an ex

[from Misconfigurations of Love – poetry]

i didn’t expect you to fix my empty heart
knowing we had much to learn
but when I held you, saw you, opened up
a part of me began to burn

any time you want it hard enough
and you’re ready for the pain
any time you feel it deep enough
you open up – once again

i may have waited for a girl like you
to find a piece of broken dreams
imagining the morning hold with you
was enough but now it seems

any time you want it hard enough
and you’re ready for the pain
any time you feel it deep enough
you open up – once again

nothings wrong, I know your passing through
that’s not a tear beneath my eye
there’s nothing wrong now that nothings new
don’t even have to say goodbye

so move along now and be on your way
another good one’s passing by
i can’t see your face, can’t feel the pain
don’t need to know the reason why

1/13/13 to pmz

January 24, 2013 | Categories: 2d, dating, poetry, sex | Tags: calling her my girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, fix my empty heart, friends with benefits, i love her, i love her not, i opened up, love saved me, pmzee, ready for the pain, rescue me, saved me, she loved me, she loves me, she loves me not, she said, song, song for an ex, song for my ex, song of loneliness, will you open up again | 1 Comment »

“If You Leave Me I’ll Have Nothing,” she said.

Before the divorce was even in the picture, my still-wife was crying. I asked her what she was tripping about.

She proceeded to tell me that she would have nothing if I left her. That there wasn’t enough retirement money put away, she didn’t make enough money, my family wouldn’t help her… And if anything happened to me, she would be destitute.

In the moment I did not understand her concern. My absence was not on my radar. So what exactly was she talking about. Of course she would be taken care of. My mom would help provide for the kids. There would be life insurance. She would be fine.

NOW… Of course, perhaps she was saying something else all together. It wasn’t about my demise, it was about my departure. My departure from the family life we had been building for over 10 years. It seriously didn’t compute for me.

Was that blind love, dumb love, or blind faith? What ever it was it was dead wrong.

Sincerely,

The Off Parent
@theoffparent

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